I have been dreading this trip to Berlin for a while. The last few times I’ve been to Europe, I’ve experienced this weird kind of…malaise. I can’t sleep at night, and I’m not allowed to sleep during the day, so I feel edgy and hopeless and disconnected. The feeling disappears as soon as I’m back home and on my usual schedule. This time, I had a brainwave: why not try a sleep aid?

Considering I used to work for the company that invented Ambien, it’s rather amazing that I’ve never tried a sleeping pill. (Their parent company made Agent Orange and genetically modified food, as I mentioned earlier; the company itself was responsible for Flagyl, a horrible anti-parasite drug that I ate like licorice while I was in the Peace Corps, and Nutrasweet. That’s a lot to answer for.) I wasn’t motivated enough to get a script (plus, the whole eating-in-your-sleep thing? like I need that!), so I grabbed some Tylenol PM before I left. The first night, I took two at the normal sleeping hour, fell into a deep sleep, and woke up completely refreshed.

The difference between this trip and the last two is indescribable. I feel terrific: energetic, happy, normal. Hell, I feel better now than I have at home, where Aitch and the Dog jump in and out of our bed at all hours of the night. I had one little low point when I turned on my computer at the start of this morning’s meeting, and saw the internal clock read “3:00 a.m.,” but other than that it’s been wonderful. The weather has been cooperating beautifully, as well, and since I’ve been running the meetings we’ve been finishing by 4:00 every day, because I hate to see bored, desperate faces staring up at me.

I’ve gotten to see so much more of the city than I did the last time. On Monday, I visited the Brandenburg Gate, the Reichstag, the Lustgarten, and the Berliner Dom. Yesterday, I got an amazing view of the city during a group dinner at the Fernsehturm (because, really, what says “tourist” better than “revolving restaurant”? If there is something, please don’t show it to me). Today, I walked through the Tiergarten to the Siegessäule and back. Tomorrow, I have tickets to the Staatsoper. It’s practically a mini-vacation.

Except, of course, for the fact that I desperately miss my boys. Even the news that Dog was skunked in my absence has not diminished my ardor to return home.